He Can't Have You And It Kills Him
by rockinchick8
Summary: Onshot on the song Cant Have You by JB. Its about Miley. enough said. Nick is still in love with Miley and he wants her back. She's getting married to someone else. Nick has to choose what's more important; His happiness or Miley's? Niley Moments!


He Just Can't Have You And It Kills Him

**He Just **_**Can't Have You**_** And It Kills Him**

"Where do I even begin? Perhaps I'll start with my name. I'm Nick Jonas of the Jonas Brothers. I'm the youngest brother with the best hair. That's one of the things that won_ her _over. She loved running her hands through my hair. Who I am talking about you ask? Her name is Miley Cyrus. I went out with her for two years but we broke up a couple years ago. Things just got…different. Yeah different. The story all began back on tour, where it all started…

_We had been dating the whole tour. We were keeping it a secret because if everyone found out, things would get to crazy. Honestly I was afraid that the fans would hate me, or even worse…Miley. I didn't want that to happen so I asked Miley to keep it on the down low. We have been going out for two years! Three this next month! But you see there's a problem, me and my brothers are going on our own tour so it's going to be very tough to keep the relationship strong. I'm gonna go talk to Miley to see what she thinks. Oh there she is now!_

"_Hey Nick!" She said cheerfully. I smiled._

"_Hey babe! Listen I have to talk with you." I said. The smile on her face quickly disappeared and a worried frown took its place._

"_Usually when someone says that it's not a good thing." Miley said nervously. I chuckled. She was such a worry wart._

"_I'm not breaking up with you," She let out a big sigh. "But I've been thinking about this upcoming tour."_

"_What about it?" Miley questioned. I could sense this was an uncomfortable topic for her._

"_Well I want to stay together still but won't it be hard? I mean I'll be alone with my brothers and tons of screaming girls." I said cautiously._

"_What, so are you saying that you're planning on doing things on this tour?" Miley asked slightly raising her voice._

"_No it's just I don't know what's gonna happen and… I just don't want to hurt you." I said._

"_So don't!" She said her voice rising more. I shook my head._

"_Look I don't know what will happen, that's why I'm questioning whether or not we should stay together." I said with my voice rising with each word._

"_So you do want to break up?" She said sadly._

"_I don't know! I just need some time to think, that's why I asked you!" I said yelling. She just looked at me shocked._

"_Well, I'm sorry I couldn't help you your majesty." She said sarcastically and left. I walked to the door and slammed it shut, but it was soon opened again._

"_Look Miley I shouldn't have…" I started saying but someone cut me off._

"_Sorry but I'm not Miley." The person said._

"_Oh hey Selena. It's nice to see you!" I said._

"_Well I wish I could say the same but you don't look too happy. Are you and Miley fighting again?" Selena asked. I nodded and told her what happened._

"_Well you know what I say? Forget her. I mean look at her! She gets mad just because you want her opinion on something that is important to you. That's not right. You deserve someone way better." She said as she played with my jacket string._

"_You know, you're right. I think I'm gonna go have a talk with her. Thanks Sel!" I said and went to find Miley. I saw her just staring out a window in her dressing room. I knocked and she turned around._

"_What do you want?" She asked coldly._

"_Look I think we should break up." I said bluntly. Her eyes widened._

_  
"What? Why?" She asked sadly._

"_Well I was talking with Selena and she made me realize that you were being really mean when all I asked was for your opinion." I said._

"_So this is Selena's idea and you're going along with it?" She asked._

"_Well no but…" I started._

"_No you trust her opinion more than mine!" She yelled._

"_That's not true! She actually listens to me and cares!" I yelled back._

"_Fine. If she listens SO well than how about you be with her instead!" She yelled so loud that the stage crew ran over to see what was going on._

"_You know what? Maybe I will! She's much better than you anyways!" I said harshly. Her eyes started to tear up. _

"_So it's really over?" She asked, fighting back the tears. I nodded._

_And I said the one word that would change our lives forever._

"_Yes."_

And that was it. She ended up running away and crying. She didn't speak to me the rest of the day and it was the last day of the tour so I never got to speak with her again. I saw her at the Hannah Montana 3D Concert Film premiere but I didn't say a word to her. I grew out my hair because Miley liked it when it was not too long and not too short but she hated it when it got really long. Hence the reason why I let it grow. A couple months later I saw her at the Kid's Choice Awards. I didn't say a word to her. I actually had to sit directly behind her. I was so tempted to just reach out and twirl her hair. A casual nod and a hello was all I said to her that night. I saw her once again at the Disney Channel Games when she was performing. She performed 7 Things. I knew it was about me. Heck, the whole world knew it was about me but when I was asked if it was, the only thing I could muster up was a "No it can't be about me. My friends aren't jerks." Once I said that I knew Miley would hate me even more.

The last time I was anywhere near Miley was the 2008 Teen Choice Awards. Me and my brothers didn't even support her dance team. I was so caught up in the whole fight we had, then I got my brothers into it and soon they hated her. I didn't know what to do so I just followed what they did. I never talked to Miley again. I never saw her again after the Teen Choice Awards, other than on TV, movies, magazines and concerts.

Then one day, my whole life changed. It was November 25th and I decided to go for a walk. I passed by Pinkberry and stopped. I looked in the window to see if there was anyone interesting there. I searched all around and then my eyes landed on someone very familiar. I ran inside to see her. As I was about to say something, Adam Sevani came to the table. I didn't know why he did, but then he said, "Let's go babe." And I knew what that meant. Miley was dating this guy. Before Miley could even say anything, I ran out. Then, I never saw her again.

Well some time passed and here we are now. I'm still singing with my brothers but we aren't nearly a quarter as popular as we were before but we have some fans still. Joe started dating Emily Osment. It was weird at first but I like them together. Kevin is married to Ashley Tisdale. Yeah things didn't work out so well with her and Jared. Kevin just happened to be there to pick up the pieces and put her back together again. And me, I'm engaged to Selena Gomez. Yeah it's exciting isn't it? I could give two damns less. It's pathetic isn't it? So much time has passed but I still can't get Miley out of my head. Everything I see reminds me of her. Even the necklace I gave Selena for her birthday reminds me of her. It's a pink necklace. Selena absolutely hates pink, but Miley loves it. I figured every time I was with Selena, the necklace would remind me of Miley and make me happy since I was so miserable.

Sometimes I really question why things are the way they are today… My two brothers are happy as can be and I'm as wretched as can be. Things could be different. If I had spoken to her when I had seen her after the break up. If I stayed in touch with her after all these years. If I had apologized when I saw her. If I had kissed her when I saw her at Pinkberry. If hadn't given up, then I would not be walking to my mailbox right now, checking for mail. I'd be with Miley, just holding her tight and never letting go. But no, I'm getting the mail and walking into the house of my ex love's sworn enemy.

Ugh! Life is depressing. As I searched through the mail, passing up all the bills, I stumbled upon a letter. It was addressed to me. I opened it up and it was an invitation. I opened up the card and read it to see who was getting married. As I read the names, I dropped the card. Miley was getting married. And it wasn't to me.

Days passed and soon the wedding arrived. It's today. I haven't decided what I'm going to do yet. I could either object when the time comes and tell Miley that I still love her, or I can just leave her alone and let her live a happy life. Or I can move to Canada with Selena and we can live in a log cabin in the middle of nowhere and never be seen again. Before this whole fight thing happened with Miley and Selena, we had a lot of fans, who also were Miley fans. Once we basically replaced Miley with Demi and Selena, a lot of those fans hated us. They lost all respect for us. That killed me. But my brothers just said not to worry about it, they aren't true fans. I kept thinking that, but then I realized that when they called us jerks…they were right. When Joe kept being mean around Miley, he was being a jerk. When Kevin wore that stupid TEAM DEMI AND SELENA shirt, he was being a jerk. When I stopped showing that I cared about Miley, I was being a jerk. Even though we did all of that and haven't talk to her in years, she still invited us and our family to the wedding. She's just that incredible.

Well I finally made my decision; I will go to the wedding and try to be friends with Miley again. Then I'll tell her how much I love and need her and then we can run away together. Forget Adam and Selena. No that's not really my plan. I will patch things up with her and be just friends…forever.

Well I'm sitting here at the wedding waiting for this stupid thing to start. Oh it's starting now. Miley is walking down the aisle with her dad. Oh my good god does she look amazing. Her dress looks amazing on her. Her hair is curled perfectly. Her beautiful smile is showing brightly to everyone.

**Long ago**

**You were gonna leave**

**Never thought**

**You would really go**

**I was blind**

**Baby now I see**

**Broke your heart**

**Now I know**

**That I was being such a fool**

**That I still don't deserve you**

When I was with her, I thought I love would last forever. When I said it was over, I never thought she would actually leave and not come back. It took me awhile to realize that I had broken her heart and that would never be healed. I'd be an idiot if I stopped this wedding. I don't deserve her at all. She deserves someone a lot better.

**Don't wanna fall asleep**

**Cause I don't know if I'll get up**

**And I don't want to cause a scene**

**But I'm dying without your love**

**Baby, to hear your voice**

**Tell me you love me too**

**Cause I'd rather just be alone**

**If I know that I cant have you**

I've never told anyone, not even my brothers, but some nights I stay up all night because when I dream I dream about Miley. When I do, I never want to leave and I'm afraid if I sleep then I might never wake up. So many times I wanted to say that I love her, right in front of cameras or even in front of the world. But that would just ruin everything even more. I can't stand not being with her. It kills me. Every time I see her, I whisper I love you and sometimes I just wish she'll hear it and say it back. I wish that I had the guts to just tell Selena how I feel and that I can't be with her. If I can't be with Miley, then I don't wanna be with anyone else.

**Looking at the letter that you left**

**Wondering if I'll ever get you back**

**Dreaming about when I'll see you next**

**Knowing that I never will forget**

**That I was being such a fool**

**That I still don't deserve you**

I remember the day her first official Miley CD came out. I was out waiting till 2am just to get it. The second it was in my hands I looked through the whole thing. She looked beautiful in all the pictures in this CD case. Then I came upon the thank you note. I read it and was sad to see that I didn't make it on her list. Then I saw she had a second thank you note with her family and friends on it. It started off with PRAISE YAHWEH, HALLELUJAH. I don't think I've ever even heard someone say that. It made me laugh. Miley would start a thank you note off like that. Well I kept reading and got even sadder until I saw the last part of the note. She thanked her "Prince Charming" everybody kept saying it was me. It was. It made me happy to read that she still loves me. Well to show her how much I appreciate her, we thanked Selena and not her in our thank you note for our CD. My second point to why she deserves someone better. I was being an idiot then, and I still am now.

**I don't wanna fall asleep**

**Cause I don't know if I'll get up**

**And I don't want to cause a scene**

**'Cause I'm dying without your love**

**Baby, to hear your voice**

**Tell me you love me too**

**Cause I'd rather just be alone**

**If I know that I cant have you**

My eyes never left her as the wedding began and went on. I kept looking at her facial expression. She looked happy, but with a hint of worry and fright. It made me wonder what was really going on in her mind.

**I don't know if I can live without you**

**Cause you know that the truth means so much more**

**I don't mind**

**Cause I'll give everything that I've got left**

**To show you and me what I had said**

**Don't wanna be such a fool**

**But I can't live without you**

I honestly don't know if I can stay here while she gets married. It kills me too much to watch this happen. Maybe I should just tell her the truth. She always liked honesty. But either way, I would do anything to even just prove that I love her and care for her more than any man could ever. If she marries this guy…I don't think I could take it.

**Don't wanna fall asleep**

**Don't know if I'll get up**

**I don't want to cause a scene**

**But I'm dying without your love**

**Baby, to hear your voice**

**Tell me you love me too**

**Cause I'd rather just be alone**

**If I know that I cant have you**

Oh god could she look anymore amazing? Everything about her looks great. Especially her eyes. They are sparkl…not sparkling. She doesn't want to be doing this. She really doesn't love this guy. I should do something.

**Don't wanna fall asleep **

**Cause I don't know if I'll get up **

**And I don't want to cause a scene**

**'Cause I'm dying without your love**

**Baby, to hear your voice **

**Tell me you love me too **

**Cause I'd rather just be alone**

**If I know that I cant have you**

The priest asked for any objections. I was about to stand up but then Miley turned around. Her eyes met mine. I could see through the beautiful cerulean eyes that looked happy. I could see through her smile that she showed everyone so they thought she was happy. And I saw right through her heart that she wasn't making the right decision and she knew it. I stood up. She looked at me and a small smile started to appear. Everybody was staring at me now, waiting to here what I had to say. I looked around, then back to Miley. I couldn't go back to her. I don't deserve someone as wonderful and beautiful and talented as her.

"Congrats you guys. I wish you best of luck. Excuse me." I said and went outside. I saw the look on Miley's face once I left. It seemed like she wanted me to object and just take her away. I couldn't do that though. I didn't deserve her. I couldn't just walk in her life and expect everything to be perfect like before. I smashed her heart into billions of pieces and just watched. This is reality, not some fairytale.

I looked in the window and saw the priest talking. He motioned his hands to Miley and Adam. Then, the third moment that would change my life forever…She kissed him. I swear right there and then my heart stopped, drank five bottles of vodka, and then threw the glass bottles at me. I kept watching. I watched Miley turn to the crowd and game them all the fakest smile. Her eyes started to search the crowd as if she was looking for someone. Her eyes landed on the treasure she was searching for. She looked at me and tried to smile. Tears streamed down my face. I couldn't take it anymore. She was married to the best guy out there. He cares about her and treats her right. She kissed that guy making it official and right there and then, it hit me. That guy who she called "the one", the guy who is standing next to her at the alter, the one who she's in love with…isn't me.

I walked away from the window and slid down on the grass. I buried my face into my hands. That all just happened but I need to move on with my life. It happened and this is something I can't fix or change.

Selena came out and saw me. She questioned why I was out here but I just shook my head. I looked at the ring I had on my finger and slid it off. I put the ring in her hand, turned and walked away. Selena kept screaming for me to come back and not do this. I never went back. I never even turned around. But this time, I knew it wasn't something I'd regret the rest of my life.

Not every fairytale has a happy ending. Miley's and mine didn't end all perfect. But if there's anything I want everybody to know, is that I always loved Miley. I never stopped. No matter who she's with, whether it's Adam Sevani or Jesse McCartney, or if I'm with Selena Gomez or Demi Lovato, I will never anybody as much as I loved her. No guy will ever care for her more than me. I love you Miley. Goodbye."

Miley dropped the letter.

**Ok I just had to write something. Lately I've been having major writers block and I don't like where I'm at with Will It Happen. I want to be somewhere else with the story so I can just finish it off already but I will update most likely soon on that. Anyways back on topic. I love the song Can't Have You and I just had to write a one shot on it. Normally I would do something happy where Niley reunites, but JB has been pissing me off lately, especially Nick, and I don't think every story can have a happy ending. Speaking of endings, it might be confusing how I ended this but what happened was that nick wrote a letter of all that had happened and since he couldn't take Miley being married, he took his life away and miley drops the letter cuz shes shocked. Idk just work with it. So tell me what you think about it. I personally think this was pretty good but I want to hear what you think. Oh and if you have any oneshot song requests, just shout them out! I love writing these things but it has to be a Miley or JB song. So yeah just review tell me what you think of the story, Niley, JB acting like jerks (beware, I can go on and on about that) oneshot requests or if you're really bored then just about something random! **


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